About a year ago, a childhood friend asked me what was the biggest lesson I learned from Mustangs on a Mission. I rattled off logistical errors I made, how I could have handled situations with people better, or saved money in different ways.
Finally, he stopped me and said, "No Sara. I mean what was the biggest lesson you learned about yourself?" I was halted in my tracks, as I sat there in the truck, I honestly didn't have an answer for him. I had not stopped long enough after the "failed" trip to really learn the lessons God had been trying to teach me all along.
For those of you who aren't sure what I am talking about so far, in 2018, myself and my friend Olivia, rode mustangs across Arizona, after planning for several years to do a full border to border mission ride. We planned, we fundraised, we got horses, we planned more, we scouted trails, we sought help from those who had done similar things, we bought the gear, we got the horses. We did our best to prepare, but in reality, we had no idea of what lay ahead. One thing I knew, no matter how silly it seems, the quote from Lonesome Dove rang in my heart, and I knew I had to try to do it myself one day.
I can't think of nothing better than riding a fine horse into a new country." - Augustus McCrae, Lonesome Dove
The closer we got to the start date the more obstacles we faced. The group of, at one time, five women riding, dwindled to two. We couldn't find a driver for our truck and trailer. Then we found a driver and my truck died. Like literally on the side of the road. It was a goner just a few days before we were set to leave for Arizona.
We were behind on nearly everything and way in over our heads. Looking back, I can see how many times God was trying to show me the closed door. He had never called me to do the ride... Saying that publicly for the first time right now is still scary years later. We had so much support and so many people rooting for us that my pride took over. I didn't want to disappoint the people who had invested so much time and money into us, but I especially didn't want to prove the people right who never thought I could do it all along.
The ride became more about proving to people what we could do combined with the fear of letting people down, especially those who had invested money in us. I was on the phone constantly with one person and then the next, always seeking the next opinion, but never sure enough of myself to make a good decision. If God did nothing else throughout the ride, he highlighted my insecurities and took me to the root of a lot of pain in my life so I could find healing and be better in the long run.
As the leader of Mustangs on a Mission, I was being tossed about in a jumble of opinions, with no clear idea of where to go. Through the whole process, I stopped looking to God, sure the ride was about telling others what He could do for them, and what He had done for me in the past, but I wasn't actually letting him work in me. Walls crept up around my heart blocking everyone out, including God.
We struggled our way through Arizona, did two events, and then we headed home with our tails tucked and heads down. I couldn't even let myself be proud of how far we had come at the time because I was so ashamed that we didn't do what we set out to do.
After all this time, I still stop and pause when I try to figure out what was the biggest lesson I learned. Mostly because I learned so much about who God is, who He created me to be, about life, and loving others that it's hard to sum it up, but I also hesitate because I want to be sure that it's not some distant memory or something I casually brush off as an "oh yeah we tried to do that once" kind of a thing.
I've come to realize that what we did was incredible! Two women who neither one grew up around horses, planned and thought out the logistics on riding horses from the Mexican border all the way to the Canadian border. We networked and had places to stay all along the way. We had events planned, and executed two extremely successful events with over 100 people between the two. We kept our horses safe and kept those who joined us on the trail safe as well. Our horsemanship skills grew exponentially. Heck we even had four minutes on Fox 10 Phoenix! I did my first demo at one of our events. But most important to me, Olivia and I figured a way to work together through it all and still come out on the other side of it best friends.
So here is a list of a few of my biggest lessons. Things I had to learn the hard way, but things that have shaped me greatly. These lessons are lessons that have helped me walk through some really dark seasons. Lessons that have taught me to be empathetic and to help others more.
1. Never be to proud to ask for help, but always stay humble enough to be the first to offer help to someone else.
2. If you're eyes are looking up, you'll always see what's coming and you won't stumble as much, but the second you start looking down, you’re more likely to fall.
3. Don't get lost focusing on putting the little fires out. Figure out what your big goal is and work on that, sometimes the little fires will put themselves out before you get to them anyway.
4. Say thank you and mean it. If you get caught up in all that has to be done and forget to appreciate everyone who has helped you, suddenly you're going to find yourself walking alone.
5. Face conflict head on with a fair mind and gentleness. You are stronger than you think, but you don't have to be bullheaded about anything. Have grace. It goes a long way.
6. If a door is closed, don't try to bust through. Respect the door and search for a different one that is open.
And lastly, my most important one...
Never let the influence of others push you towards doing something you shouldn't do or keep you from trying something you should do.
I honestly can't say Mustangs on a Mission is something I think God had really intended for my life, but in spite of that, He used it in great ways in not only my life, but in the lives of so many people we met. We got to see the joy of children's faces light up as they pet a horse or round penned a mustang for the first time. We got to see some of the most beautiful country. We got to ride some good horses for a long ways.
Mustangs on a Mission was an experience I'll never forget. Something I may try to repeat one day. And definitely a journey that would lead me to encourage you, if you have a big dream out there, try it out! You may find a closed door, but you might just find a door wide open to the journey of a lifetime!
xo,
Sara
PS. If you ever come upon a closed door in life, rather than being so scared about a lack of opportunity there, be excited because God definitely has better plans behind the next door for you.
“It ain’t dying I’m talking about, it’s living. I doubt it matters where you die, but it matters where you live.” ~spoken by Augustus McCrae ― Larry McMurtry, Lonesome Dove
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